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How to make a lasting New Year’s Resolution

How to make a lasting New Year’s Resolution

December 28, 2018 By Colleen Morris Leave a Comment

How-to-make-a-lasting-New-Year’s-Resolution

I am struck by the thought that with the beginning of a new year I am on the brink of new possibilities, new adventures, new opportunities. I feel optimistic because the next 365 days are a blank cheque. How will I choose to spend them?

I don’t see much sense in spending that time wishing my lot were different or going over and over past regrets. By doing so, I miss what is going on in the here and now. It is like going on a trip to a place I have never been and failing to absorb the experience because I am too preoccupied with my problems back home— a senseless and costly exercise! So back to the present. How to spend my 365 blank cheques? How do I make a lasting New Year’s Resolution that actually helps me to change my life?

I have never been good with New Year’s Resolutions. For many people the exercise is a very helpful and practical way of setting and achieving goals for success. For me, I learnt long ago that I am a person who constantly sets internal expectations for myself.

I get bored easily, so I am always looking for the next new thing I can direct my energies towards. However, as soon as I make it a ‘goal’ I panic! The way my personality functions, goals become expectations that have the potential to crush me if I am not constantly monitoring their weight! Expectations, be they external or internal, have to be held at arms length.

I have learnt that to function well, I need a healthy balance between what I hope to achieve and my over all sense of wellness.

I am not prepared to sacrifice my wellness for personal achievement – been there and done that! So it is a balancing act. It means that I don’t always achieve everything on my list but because my internal driver is always barking at me, neither do I entirely forget them.

So I am thinking that I need to reframe the word ‘goal’ to a more ‘user friendly’ option for the benefit of we ‘goal-challenged’ folk. How about ‘ future hopes’ or ‘projects for 2019′ or ‘new possibilities for 2019′. Now for you goal- driven people I am aware that these are poor substitutes but it works for me. I can breathe a bit and give myself time and space to do the task at my own pace.

Procrastination? Yes, I am given to procrastination – sometimes out of fear but other times out of a need to go gently on myself and understand that I can become easily overwhelmed. What I do find is that by holding my goals at arms length, I am give myself ‘grace’ – permission to be human, to back off, reflect and rest.

This blank cheque? Well I hope to continue to grow my business and I have strategies to help facilitate this. More importantly, I want to enjoy the journey on the way. I want to nurture my relationships, I want to be happy and enjoy a level of wellness.

I will use 365 days of opportunity purposely. I have possibilities that will come to reality and they are tempered by the larger goal to experience and absorb each day’s joys and value my own health and well being.

365 days full of new possibilities. What do you hope to do with them? How do you go about deciding that? Let us know in the comments below!

Do you want a fresh start in 2019? Would you like support making or keeping your resolutions? Here’s what you need to do: Contact Colleen on 0434 337 245 or Duncan on 0434 331 243  for a FREE 10 minute consultation on how we can best help you or book online .

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Filed Under: Personal Growth and Wellbeing Tagged With: New Year, New Year Resolutions, resolution

About Colleen Morris

Colleen is a counsellor and family therapist who founded Watersedge Counselling. To read more of her work or book an appointment click here.

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